The Perfectionist - The Doubter - And The Hater
Coming soon to a theater near you! 🤩
Ps. If you're not familiar with the old movie: The Good, The Bad, And The Ugly, this picture doesn't make sense. 😆
Life is a constant ongoing movie 🎥. You are the director of your own movie, and you have the leading role, and you also have the supporting roles. Let me present you a part of my movie, aka my life, and the roles: The Perfectionist - The Doubter - The Hater
They often come in this order and rank from least bad to worst.
The Perfectionist
The Perfectionist is constantly trying to make it better, never satisfied. Always looking for what's wrong, inexistent flaws, and never at everything else that's great. Unless it's perfect, it's not good enough and drives me to insanity.
Dealing with the Perfectionist is doable, sometimes easier, sometimes more challenging. Because sometimes he comes by himself and wants to irritate you a bit, but you manage to keep him on distance. It's when he brings his buddy The Doubter where shit starts to hit the fan.
The Doubter
When you think you have managed to deal with The Perfectionist and everything feels under control and you're ready to go, The Doubter decides to come in and start throwing self-doubts all over the place and makes you question everything. It begins with some tickling, turning into slaps, turning into jabs, turning into straight-up blows to your face.
The Doubter opens up your self-confidence with a crack and then slowly starts to dig itself down little by little, sucking out more and more of that precious juice of self-confidence you have. It gets harder to do stuff, constant self-rejection, and you're getting into analysis paralysis mode.
When The Doubter has managed to suck out most of your self-confidence, that's when he let his buddy The Hater take over to finalize the job. And here is where it starts to get really nasty and dark.
The Hater
The Hater has one mission, one sole purpose: And that is to rip you apart, rip that crack (that The Doubter created) wide open, to annihilate you. He tells you that you fucking suck, that you're a loser, that you're not worth anyone or anything. To give up on whatever you're doing and whatever you have a plan on doing. To never go through with it.
And here's where it spirals down to the bottom of that deep black hole where my dear friend Depression greets me with open arms. Did you notice I wrote "dear"? Yeah, You can't live with depression if you're going to hate it. I have accepted it as a part of me loving myself, and I try to make the best of the situation and even use my depression to my advantage.
My Solution
I often don't take my own advice when I'm deep down in that black hole, even though I know damn well it's going to help! The problem is that it's extremely tough to take your own pieces of advice when you are in that negative spiral, and The Hater still exists in your mind, and you sit there with your friend Depression.
But what has often worked for me, and what has been the kryptonite to this triplet described above, is a cocktail of: self-awareness, mindfulness, acceptance, self-compassion, exercise, being in nature, being surrounded by great friends and family, and daring to be emotional and openly vulnerable about it. ♥️
My Conclusion
I, Benjamin Vozmediano, am tired of doubting and self-rejecting myself, tired of self-hatred. I have had enough of that. Let others do that job. One thing is for sure: They will not be even close to doing, as a fantastic job with that, as I do. Which will serve me perfectly. 😉✌🏽
PS. If you know anyone who might benefit from reading this, please spread the word by forwarding the link or sharing it on your socials. Thanks for considering. 🙏🏽❤️💫
Make sure you hit that Subscribe button if you like getting my blog posts directly to your inbox.
